Building Personal Beacons
A fantasy to guide your reality
As the tides began to crawl aboard, our faiths began to fall.
Fear swept our souls ashore, before death enslaved us all.
Our ears deafened to our captain’s call, but heeded to the creaking noises as the masts began to fall.
But soon a shout afore, with fingers trembling towards up north.
Behold a light appeared, the beacon we’ve all been hoping for.
Our hope returned our strengths, every man ready to endure.
For whatever this storm will take from us, we are ready to settle the score.
With all in one accord, we paddled the wrecks up shore.
The best teacher I met in medical school is a smallish old man in the department of urology. I fail to call him a teacher; I prefer to call him an educationist. The first time we met him, he asked all of us to find beacons; something to guide us reach our individual goals as we were in our final year (I doubt anybody took that serious). The next day however, after asking some of us our beacons (me excluded), he fed us with a beacon he created for us. A recital we were to say every morning before school (he sounds like a kindergarten teacher right?).
“My aim is, during my final MBChB, if I should get a long case, which is a urological clinical case, I’ll be successful”. (Of course, like many of us I never said this prayer to grace my mornings). On any good day, you are likely to find us gathered around him on the ward (most of us in pissed off faces as he looks around trying to catch a non reciter) reciting out loud this aim, which was to become our beacon.
Boring right?
Don’t worry I’m not here to tell you about that demeaning experience that humored our patients. What I’m about to tell you is the answer I found for my assignment (you really thought I didn’t do it?) which he never asked of me. I created a beacon for myself; not one to get me through medical school but one to get me through life.
How I built my fantasy beacon.
I’m not a fan of role-models. Actually, I’ve never had one. I feel in the normal scheme of things learning is a downstream of knowledge. You can never have more information than the book you read, or the one who teaches you. Combining two sources will only make you better than one, not both combined. Same way I feel setting your bar to that of a role model only cushions you to settle below the bar of accomplishments.
What if you can pick a role model bigger than anybody’s accomplishments?
Then falling below that bar leaves you still a step ahead of them. To me that perfect role model is my dreams.
How do I live everyday with a dream as my role model?
That’s to say I’m chasing fantasies or living an unrealistic life.
Here is where a beacon comes in.
A beacon guides navigators to their destination. Beacons are best positioned at the highest point closest to the destination of the navigator.
The question therefore is, where is your destination?
We all have one sure destination we hate to mention to ourselves. Destination death. So close to death, we can position a perfect beacon. I found the perfect location for my beacon; the old grey-haired me! Now I needed the perfect height to complete my beacon.
The finishing question becomes, the day I become old, maybe a year before I leave this earth, when I sit down alone for a minute on my porch and blank out of the world into myself, what picture would I want to see of myself; what life would I wish I had lived; would I have any regrets? After answering those questions, I found my beacon.
I’ll share my beacon with you.
On the squeaky rocking chair, an old man sits. Grey haired with a brown walking stick hanging on the arm rest. He starred into the clouds as if to arrange it’s clouds with a widening smile. Within a school of memories, he buried himself; scenes of people he had touched in his life; people he remains the artist who sketched the smiles on their faces; people whose memories he holds a bigger part of; and people whose lives he had blessed. Smiles to grin, the crazy things he had in the name of youth took stage as his eyes shut to the heaviness of these thoughts. I doubt he had any regrets draining him now. No score left to be settled, no enemies left unfriended. There rocks the old man at peace with life.
Time to stop dreaming but…
I promise I was about to wake from this imagination when this beautiful old woman walked towards him, saying something that made him grin at her. She sat on his lap and buried her head into his chest. He rubbed his hands gently through her hair as they rocked into a conversation that made him wear this look of tease. They looked like best friends, a perfect ride to death.
But a call came through.
Who’s that bubble burster?
He kissed her on the forehead, picked the call on loud speaker and they both got into the conversation on the phone. Conversations from the other side said daddy. Screams from the background said grandpa we miss you. I heard him say at the end, “don’t worry babe, the master chef’s gat you.”
Fast forward to when he left the pouch, he went straight to the kitchen to fix his lady a plate for dinner as she walked behind him puling on his shirt playfully not to go.
This image still gets me high on imagination.
It’s funny how I didn’t think of cars, or houses or how rich I would be. To be frank with you the house I saw him in was a small house with a big backyard made of grass and flowers he planted himself.
Chasing this fantasy of a beacon, I realized the important lots in my life
- Invest my effort in making other people happy.
- I had to grow old and still be strong. It was time to start living a healthy life before all those ‘blood rush' and ‘sugar piss' catch me.
- Be the coolest dad, grandpa and husband ever; so I had to live an interesting life and not dedicate my whole life to my career.
- All that mattered when it comes to women and girls, was this one woman who sat on my lap. Time to focus young me!
- No room for enemies and regrets; so I should leave no misunderstanding unsettled and I have to walk away anytime my anger knocks on the door. (This I have to consult my pride first)
- Master chef? Yeah! I’m beginning to love cooking again. Stealing recipes now. (watch out for me in your kitchen)
Basically all I do now is ask myself, would this help build that old man I pictured?
No?
Then it’s not worth my time
Yes?
Then that’s 100% me you have there.
I live now towards the direction of this beacon I made for myself. Can you share with me, if you ever build one?
